Rituals Western Style

I am listening to a program by Joan Halifax. In it she was saying how bereft she felt the West was of rituals of passage.

Yesterday as I sat at the inauguration of Naropa's fifth president, I realized it was very much a ritual of passage not only for our new president, Dr. Stuart C. Lord, but also for the faculty, staff, students, board of trustees and communities that are touched by Naropa. It seemed so appropriate that a school that teaches it students how to make rituals would include a very sweet ritual for the actual swearing in ceremony with Dr. Lord sitting on a cushion with the Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche combined with the usual Western style speeches of congratulations, and invocations and music from African, American Native, and other religious traditions.

Most of my life, I have avoided such programs. My initial incentive to go was to support Dr. Lord as a student and as a person of color. Then it was to support the Rinpoche and my Shambhala community. Finally it was in recognition of my own need for more ritual and community in my life and the sheer joy of participating in it. I was happy to arrive early and find something useful to do to be of help.

Today I attended a ritual of a completely different flavor and texture. The Rinpoche is going away on retreat for a year and this was a going away party of sorts. But so consistent with this being a contemplative community, there was a very long, slow, silent ritual by an archer. There were chants and incantations in Tibetan by the Rinpoche's mother, step father and step brother, chants by the community for his longevity, and a blessing ceremony for the whole community. The sweetest part to me was the deep-felt request from Acharya Judith Simmer-Brown to the Rinpoche on behalf of the entire community for the Rinpoche to live a long life and to continue to teach his community. You could feel the depth of her own heartbreak from losing past teachers to death and at the thought of the Sakyong being away from the community for a full year.

I also attended the dialogues on Thursday night. I had the honor of refilling the water glasses for the dialogue participants. I had to find the pitcher and glasses and get everything ready. It seemed like something small at first and then I felt like I had been given a great responsibility. I had an opportunity to care for them in advance and to be very mindful of them throughout the whole dialogue in a way I would not have if I hadn't in my own way been a participant too.

One of my Naropa undergraduate friends is graduating in December. She told me all about her plans for her family and friends to come to the graduation and how excited she is about this opportunity to take the walk to get her degree. I did not even go to my undergraduate ceremony. I only went to my high school and MBA ceremony for the benefit of my mother primarily.

As I sat in the audiences these past few days and listened to my friends excitement yesterday, I realized that I have missed something important by not participating in the rituals that I have passed by over the years including many funerals. Through our Cultivating the Sacred class, I am learning how valuable rituals are and how few opportunities we actually do have to participate in them in our culture. So the next time someone invites me to a wedding or a ceremony of any type, I will not so quickly turn up my nose at it and may even accept with joy instead of disdain and go and really be mindful of the opportunity I have to particpate in a rite of transition Western style.