My little boy cat Colbi was killed last night by a coyote. It was a gisly site and certainly not the way I would like to remember my amazing "acrobat o cat." He could fly through the air with such grace and turn sommersaults. It was a such a joy to play with him. And so those are the pictures I am trying to hold in my head.
We found his little body right across the road in front of my house, and that is where I buried him with my own hands. I didn't even have a shovel. I used a scissor to dig the dirt and a cat liter trowel to move the dirt. It didn't seem to matter how hard it was. It seemed I needed to do something physical.
My professor Lama Tempa says that what happens to us is our karma. So, my faith in what I believe was tested today, to know and to accept that this was my dear one's karma and my karma to not share in his future. When I found him at the shelter, he had a kidney problem. I adopted him because he was from a "kill" shelter and I thought he would have a hard time being adopted. For 8 short months at least his life was extended and mine was enhanced. I am very grateful.
Who knows why we come into each other's lives and how long we will share our time here. For sure, grief and suffering are real. I believe too that while I will grieve for Colbi's passing, the gift of my practice is that I will not prolong the suffering. "This too shall pass."
May Colbi have a very blessed rebirth.
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